From: Mac Jackson
Date: Apr 16, 2005 8:48 AM
Subject: Beer
To: Will Jackson
Will,
Following on from PL "who let the dogs out"
try The dangers of drinking beer - so, soooo true.
Dad.Which reminds me of the old joke: Q: How do you turn a dog into a fox?
A: Drink eight pints of lager.
Boom boom.
-----Original Message-----
From: Ian Gardner
Sent: 25 March 2005 22:38
To: Will Jackson
Subject: contribution to the guide for ya!
Take The Alcohol Knowledge TestI'm pleased(?) to say my score was "Bourbon":Congratulations! You're 104 proof, with specific scores in beer (80) , wine (83), and liquor (60). Screw all that namby-pamby chick stuff, you're going straight for the bottle and a shot glass! It'll take more than a few shots of Wild Turkey or 99 Bananas before you start seeing pink elephants. You know how to handle your alcohol, and yourself at parties.
Tell me how you did.From: Anthony Rudd
Sent: 13 April 2005 16:22
To: Will Jackson
Subject: The 10 worst album covers of all time
This made me laugh so much, I had to pass them on.
The 10 worst album covers of all time
Anthony Rudd
Area Manager
Trafficlink (UK) LtdFrom: Ian Gardner
Date: Mar 23, 2005 7:00 PM
Subject: Fw: FW: [Fwd: Beer Theories]
To: "Will Jackson (HM)"
W
Beer facts related email for the guide - if it's any use.
> Beer Theories
>
> Sometimes when I reflect on all the beer I drink, I feel ashamed.
> Then I look into the glass and think about the workers in the
> brewery and all of their hopes and dreams. If I didn't drink this
> beer, they might be out of work and their dreams would be shattered.
> I think, "It is better to drink this beer and let their dreams
> come true than be selfish and worry about my liver."
>
> -- Babe Ruth
>
> An intelligent man is sometimes
> forced to be drunk to spend time with his fools.
>
> -- Ernest Hemingway
>
> When I read about the evils of drinking, I gave up reading.
>
> -- Paul Hornung
>
> 24 hours in a day, 24 beers in a case.
> Coincidence? I think not.
>
> - H.L. Mencken
>
> When we drink, we get drunk. When we get drunk, we fall asleep.
> When we fall asleep, we commit no sin. When we commit no sin, we go
> to heaven. So, let's all get drunk and go to heaven!
>
> George Bernard Shaw
>
> Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy.
>
> - Benjamin Franklin
>
> Without question, the greatest invention in the history of mankind
> is beer. Oh, I grant you that the wheel was also a fine invention,
> but the wheel does not go nearly as well with pizza.
>
> -- Dave Barry
>
> Beer: helping ugly people have sex since 3000 b.c.
>
> -- W.C. Fields
>
> Remember "I" before "E", except in Budweiser.
>
> Professor Irwin Corey
>
> To some it's a six-pack, to me it's a
> "support group." Salvation in a can!
>
> -- Leo Durocher
>
> One night at Cheers, Cliff Clavin explained the "Buffalo Theory" to
> his buddy, Norm. "Well ya see, Norm, it's like this. A herd of
> buffalo can only move as fast as the slowest buffalo. And when the
> herd is hunted, it is the slowest and weakest ones at the back that
> are killed first. This natural selection is good for the herd as a
> whole, because the general speed and health of the whole group keeps
> improving by the regular killing of the weakest members. In much
> the same way, the human brain can only operate as fast as the
> slowest brain cells. Excessive intake of alcohol, as we know, kill
> brain cells. But naturally, it attacks the slowest and weakest
> brain cells first. In this way, regular consumption of beer
> eliminates the weaker brain cells, making the brain a faster and
> more efficient machine! That's why you always feel smarter after a
> few beers.
